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Vampyros Lesbos – review

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Director: Jess Franco

Release date: 1971

Contains spoilers

As I write this we are only a couple of months away from the blog’s 8th birthday. During that time I have reviewed a whole array of vampire movies from around the world. Many of those films I had on DVD (and sometime vhs) before I ever contemplated writing Taliesin Meets the Vampires. Most of those I had before have now been reviewed. There are a couple of notable exceptions.

burlesque interpretative performance
So, very recently I received an email from a blog reader asking about a missing review; specifically, wondering where the Vampyros Lesbos review had got to. It wasn’t missing however - I just hadn’t gotten around to it yet! This is, of course, unforgivable on my part as it is arguably Jess Franco’s best known vampire film (it’s either this or Female Vampire). Now I have to admit a love/hate relationship with Franco. I find myself drawn to his films and then being disappointed. My expectations and anticipation, more often than not, utterly overwhelm his execution. Vampyros Lesbos is no different really except that it is from the golden age of Franco films.

Linda and Omar
Spurred on by the email I sat down to dip into the world of Franco and revisit Vampyros Lesbos. After opening shots of the Countess Carody (Soledad Miranda, Count Dracula), boats and the minarets of Istanbul we shift into a night club and see the Countess (not revealed as such until later) offering a burlesque interpretative performance. The music has to be mentioned as Vampyros Lesbos has a wonderfully surreal acid jazz soundtrack that is perfectly evocative of the time it was shot. In the crowd are the lovers Linda Westinghouse (Ewa Strömberg) and Omar (Andrés Monales) – Omar has a thin moustache and eyes that dart like an “eagle eyes action man”.

telepathically calling Linda
We see Linda dreaming, and get images as the Countess calls out telepathically to her, such as blood drops on a window, a moth and a scorpion. Franco places these key symbols – and a kite – through the film. We cut to her on a psychiatrist’s couch and she admits having recurring dreams about the woman and an island beach house, neither of which she knows, and was shocked when she saw the performer as it was the woman from her dreams. She admits that the dreams both scare and arouse her. The psychiatrist simply doodles and then puts it all down to sexual frustration and tells her to get a better lover.

victim of a serial killer
Linda works in the Istanbul office of the law firm Simpson & Simpson and has to go to visit Countess Carody about an inheritance. She gets so far on her journey but misses a boat and has to stay in a hotel where a creepy man called Memmet (Jess Franco) warns her away from the island as it is a place of madness and death. He asks her to meet him in the wine cellar and she goes there to see a bleeding, tied woman – later we discover that Memmet is a serial killer. This, however, does not seem to trouble the lawyer who gets the next boat to the island without raising the find with the authorities!

Seconds before passing out
At the beach house – which is all too familiar – she finally meets the Countess, who is sunbathing. This is one of the interesting things about Vampyros Lesbos, Franco overturns the gothic for beaches and beach houses, darkness and moonlight for sand and sunbathing. Rather than get straight down to business the two women go skinny dipping and sunbathing (observed secretly by the Countess’ servant Morpho (José Martínez Blanco, also from Count Dracula)). At dinner they talk about the complex inheritance left to the Countess by Count Dracula – he was a Hungarian, the Countess correctly confides. Some wine (maybe drugged, maybe blood) and Linda suggests she has a headache and then passes out.

José Martínez Blanco as Morpho
She is carried to her bedroom by Morpho and then seduced by the Countess. In the morning she awakens and finds the Countess’ body floating in the swimming pool, passes out and wakes in a private hospital run by Dr Seward (Dennis Price, Son of Dracula (1974), The Horror of it All, The Magic Christian, Dracula Prisoner of Frankenstein& Twins of Evil). She has amnesia but a newspaper advert leads Omar to her. Also in the hospital is Agra (Heidrun Kussin) – Agra is interesting as she is kind of a female Renfield, she had been to the island and is psychically linked (and obsessed) with the Countess. She was Memmet’s wife and so it seems that her obsession was that which caused him to become a serial killer.

wine or blood?
Franco playing with the genre was fun. Seward is the vampire hunter but he is more interested in becoming a vampire than hunting them. There is very little in the way of religious aspect but he manages to hurt the Countess (who, of course, was not dead in the pool) with a Latin chant. He also tells us that a vampire must be killed by giving the brain a deadly blow – suggesting a hatchet or iron bar. We have the drinking of wine that is really blood (later in the film, though it may have also happened on the first meeting too). We discover that the Countess was a mortal in Istanbul and was attacked and raped by soldiers and rescued by Dracula. It is the rape that made her hate men and become a lesbian.

embarrassing tussle
The film is languid but that adds to its dreamlike quality and it is perhaps the dreamlike quality that enables us to forgive some of the plot contrivances. It doesn’t descend into silliness like a lot of Franco films (except, perhaps, during a brief fight between Seward and Morpho). There is a fair bit of nudity but nothing particularly hardcore and some of it is actually tastefully done. Certainly it is unlikely that Soledad Miranda ever looked more beautiful than in some of the shots in the film.

Soledad Miranda is at her finest
The frustration is that Franco made some incredibly intelligent plays in the film – such as his handling of the move from Gothic to beach – but these moments become lost in some of the contrivances (as much as the dreamy quality allows those). If I say that this deserves 4 out of 10 then I am probably being very fair but I do have to say that it is worth more than the sum of its score.

The imdb page is here.


Interesting Shorts: Phantoms

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This story by Iván Turgénieff dates from 1863 and the accompanying illustration was taken from the 1904 edition of “the Novels and Stories of Ivan Turgenieff: Phantoms and Other Stories”, which was translated by Isabell F Hapgood.

Written in the first person, the narrator explains in the first instance how the phantom of a woman started coming to him. His first description of her, which he assumes is a dream, is interesting as he seems to be describing sleep paralysis. The apparition keeps asking him to meet her at the corner of a nearby forest by an old, lightning blasted oak. Eventually he does go there.

When he meets her she asks him to give himself to her, she seems reluctant to act without permission and – more as an experiment than anything – he eventually says “Take me”. She embraces him and flies into the sky with him. At first his concern is the flight itself but I found the descriptions of her semi-corporeality interesting. She is more phantom than physical and yet is able to interact. She can take him, in this manner, to anywhere he wishes to go – almost in the blink of an eye. But when, at one point, he suggests America she admits she cannot as it is day time there.

On their first flight there is a telling line, “Again she fell upon my neck, again my feet left the earth”, of course that is a telling line from a modern viewpoint. Perhaps more explicit was the later sentence “I felt on my lips a strange sensation, like the touch of a soft, delicate sting… Leeches which are not vicious take hold in that way.” The phantom will not tell him anything in detail about herself. She gives the name Ellis, but denies English heritage. She displays jealousy but often seems cold and far off. We do see her in the first light of dawn. She seems to become more corporeal and then melts like vapour.

There is one particular night where she seems able to show him wonderments – but his own fear prevents it. It is clear that he is becoming more and more ill with their interactions. His housekeeper comments that he seems to have no blood in his face and he does wonder whether she is drinking his blood. We discover that she is able to be detained by something, that there is another entity that Ellis describes as death and refers to in the feminine. We discover that Ellis is trying to acquire life. The narrator is told he has anᴂmia by a doctor.

However we are never told exactly what she is. The narrator doesn’t really know and muses, “What was Ellis, as a matter of fact? A vision, a wandering soul, an evil spirit, a sylph, a vampire?” However, to me, she was clearly a vampiric ghost, all the more interesting because she had the peculiar semi-corporeality I mentioned and she needed permission to interact with (and prey upon) her victim – an invitation, in fact. He seemed obsessed with her and there was a sensuality that she tried to display – though she often lapsed into indifference – and a claim of love for her chosen victim that was more a jealous possessiveness than love. Given the year of publication I find the story to be very exciting, giving us another insight into the development of the genre.

You can download an e-version of “the Novels and Stories of Ivan Turgenieff: Phantoms and Other Stories” from the Internet Archive.

Honourable mentions: The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

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I was not really aware of the Mortal Instruments series of young adult books, they had simply passed me by with barely a flicker on the radar. The same went with this 2013 film directed by Harald Zwart. Then a friend told me it had vampires in it and it was straight onto the radar.

The story follows Clary (Lily Collins, Priest) a young girl who starts subconsciously drawing a rune and seeing things that others cannot see, including what looks like the murder of a man in a club by a young man she later discovers is called Jayce (Jamie Campbell Bower, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn part 1& part 2).

the rune
Her drawing of the rune is a sign that a magical block her mother, Jocelyn (Lena Headey, The Cave& the Brothers Grimm), has had warlock Magnus Bane (Godfrey Gao) put on her memories and powers is weakening. You see Jocelyn was a Shadowhunter, a band of warriors who have drunk the blood of the Angel Raziel and are known as Nephilim (half angel) or are born of a shadowhunter (like Clary). Jocelyn had stolen the Mortal Cup (the grail that the blood of the angel is consumed from) from her lover and rogue shadowhunter Valentine (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) and hid both it and their daughter (Clary) from him – this latest blossoming of Clary's powers has revealed them and Valentine’s men manage to get hold of Jocelyn, who induces a magical coma on herself.

fangs on show
The Shadowhunters fight demons, using runes etched into their bodies to give them powers, and have an accord with other creatures such as werewolves (Being Human’s Aidan Turner makes a transition from playing vampire to playing werewolf) and vampires. However, when visiting Magnus, Clary’s mundane (ie human) friend Simon (Robert Sheehan) is kidnaped by vampires (who put something that remains unexplained in a drink, this chokes him and they run off with him). Thereafter Jayce, Clary and the brother and sister shadowhunters Alec (Kevin Zegers, Vampire (2011)) and Isabelle (Jemima West) go to rescue him from an abandoned hotel that is the vampire’s hideout. They get to him ok, battered and hanging above a lift shaft but he reveals it is a trap to capture Clary and a major fight ensues with lots of vampires.

vampire gun
Eventually interference from the werewolves, storming the hotel and attacking the vampires, allows them to escape the building and the rising sun, which burns vampires, enables their getaway. Simon finds out, when he eventually comes around, that he no longer needs glasses and Clary notices he has been bitten. This is not followed up in the film but – if the films follow the books – he will be turned in the next film. That might mean there is enough vampiric activity in the next film to warrant a review, but for this film the single section was a side-line rather than a main plot point. The only other vampire related thing to mention is the vampire gun that pneumatically pushes a stake from the barrel and has rotating barbs at the end – designed to pierce and destroy the heart.

The film itself wasn’t too bad, essentially a young adult adventure story with a supernatural focus, if you like that sort of thing. The imdb page is here.

The Vampire in Slavic Cultures – review

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Editor: Thomas J Garza

First published: 2009

Contains spoilers

The Blurb: Eight hundred years before Bram Stoker gave us the West's most memorable vampire in Dracula (1897) and long before the exploits of Vlad "the Impaler" Tepes horrified Europe (1431-46), the Russian Primary Chronicles write of a Novgorodian priest as Upyr' Likhij, or Wicked Vampire (1047). The Slavic and Balkan worlds abound in histories, legends, myths and literary portraits of the so-called undead, creatures which draw life out of the living in order to sustain their own. These stories of the vampire simultaneously fascinate and horrify, as they draw the reader closer to an understanding of death and the undead.

This unique volume brings together a wide variety of historical, critical, and literary texts that reveal and explore the origins, growth, and development of the vampire myth from its beginnings to the 21st century. These texts explore the vampire within the region of its origin in Western cultures: the lands of the Balkans, Eastern Europe and Russia. From the earliest recorded tales to the recent offerings of Russian vampires on film, this volume gives the reader a dynamic perspective on one the world's most enduring cultural phenomena, the vampire.

The Review: Normally I try to avoid comment on price when doing a review – content is more important, and I’d expect a higher price for an academic reference book. However I must mention that (at time of review) the new volume price for this book, on Amazon UK, has only just (for the first time) dipped below £100. On Amazon US it is still over $115.

Now, trusting I didn’t spend anywhere near that for my used copy, and despite the fact that it is a large tome, the contents of this would seem to be problematic given the price. Firstly it is made up of extracts from other works (all accredited) as well as having a section of literary offerings. There are extracts ranging from the great – for example Keyworth’s Troublesome Corpses– to the not so great – I still have no love for Konstantinos’ Vampires: the Occult Truth. However extracts from books such as Dundes’ The Vampire a Casebook and just about anything by Perkowski were noticeable by their absence. Perhaps permission to reprint couldn’t be gained, however missing these when including some of the lower quality extracts seemed at best a mistake.

The first section contains several definitions of vampires. Pulling these together from a variety of sources was a great idea. It allows the student to see several variants. However it has absolutely no commentary and this is a problem. So, when we get mention of vampires taking the form of a monstrous bat, Garza does not inform the reader that the primary association of bats and vampires comes from the novel Dracula. Given this is a reference book I would have expected some commentary but the book contains no primary commentary on the extracts, hence suggesting that Garza is an editor rather than author at the head of the review (he does translate a couple of pieces).

Worst still is that the reference for each extract dates the extract to the publication Garza used. Thus, when we read the definition of vampire from Dudley Wright’s Vampires and vampirism it offers the date of 2001 (the date the specific publication it was lifted from was reprinted) but the reader may be unaware that the original publication date is 1914. Looking at the date enables us to track changes in genre/folklore thoughts (to be absolutely fair some of the literature, later in the volume, carries an original publication date at the end).

Worse comes with the referencing and footnotes from the extracts. Some have them intact, some don’t – and we know some should have footnotes because the footnote’s citation number is still in the text but the foot (or end) note is nowhere to be seen. At the best this was lazy and unhelpful.

There are sections on both Vlad Ţepeş and Erzsébet Báthory. In the introduction Garza admits that neither was Slavic but suggests that “the geographic proximity of their dominions to the lands of the Slavs clearly had an effect on the development of the vampire myth in those neighbouring countries,” No evidence is offered for this by Garza, though he does suggest that both figures were given the “moniker of ‘vampire’”. Certainly that never occurred until post-Stoker for Ţepeş. Then again, given the cover of the volume I shouldn’t have been surprised by this content. Anyway, the sections themselves carry little in the way of balanced extracts. Though I personally suspect Báthory was guilty (at least to a degree) of the crimes accused (though they were used by her enemies to their advantage) I would have liked to have seen a “she was innocent and framed” article as a balance. As for Ţepeş an extract from Dracula: Sense and Nonsense or similar was sorely needed to offer a balanced viewpoint.

I was mystified as to why an essay on The Golem was included – again commentary would have explained Garza’s thinking, perhaps he expected readers would only be people with his lesson plan? I was also mystified as to why an extract from Blavatsky’s Isis Unveiled was included, only to be followed by a Montague Summers’ extract that contained the very same extract!

I was rather excited about the literature section. Though I have read the Night Watch (there is an extract from this), Viy and the Family of the Vourdalak there were others included that I had been unaware of and wanted to read. Positively I discovered Jan Neruda’s The Vampire and Iván Turgénieff’s Phantoms (even if I had to find the date of publication from other sources).

I was bemused at the inclusion of the extract from Dracula and the full text of the Vampyre: A Tale. Let us look at the title of the book again – In Slavic Cultures – as important as these two works are, they are not from Slavic culture (though some of the lore used by Stoker is). Other inclusions that were actually from Slavic culture (primarily Russian, it has to be said) bemused me just as much. Karamzin’s the Island of Bornholm is certainly gothic but may not even have a troublesome corpse, never mind a vampire (and is deliberate in its obfuscation). There were four Pushkin poems included – ish. I say ish because The Bridegroom was included twice. A commentary explaining why the different translations were included would have been useful. More useful would have been an explanation why The Bridegroom (x2) and Evil Spirits were included as neither contains any hint of vampirism. At least Pushkin’s the Drowned Man has a troublesome corpse in it, though whether it was a vampire in the strictest sense of the word is highly debatable.

Pelevin’s A Werewolf Problem in Central Russia is fantastic – but has no vampire aspect (so why not an extract from his (currently untranslated) vampire novel Empire V?) Indeed why not two extracts (the vampire parts obviously) from the Probratim: A Slav Novel by Prof. P Jones (1895)? (If you are interested, my reference book, The Media Vampire, covers this work pp136-144!) Indeed why not an extract or the full text of Milovan Glišić’s Posle Devedeset Godina or 90 Years Later– unfortunately not available yet in English but based on pure Slavic vampire lore and the legend of Sava Savanović. The volume’s final section contained vampire lyrics in Russian popular music, which is fair enough if you want that sort of thing.

To be fair, the interesting sections were interesting, but the book has one more sin that needs to be recounted. It doesn’t have an index, so its academic use becomes further limited. In total honesty the book confounded my expectations as I expected a fresh reference work that explored the Slavic vampire rather than a regurgitation of other books, many of which I had. If you see it cheap you might want it, if you are in Garza’s classes then it expect it becomes much more useful but at full price it comes with a health warning. 5 out of 10.

Hammer Time

Tales from the Cryptkeeper – Vampire episodes – review

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Director: Laura Shepherd

First aired: 1993-94

Contains spoilers

Tales from the Cryptkeeper was a cartoon series based on the live action Tales from the Crypt, aimed at a younger audience and hosted by the Cryptkeeper (John Kassir). We have previously looked at three of the live action episodes, Comes the Dawn, Cold War and the Reluctant Vampire, as well as the spin-off film Bordello of Blood.

beauty has no reflection
The reason I started looking at the series was due to the episode The Sleeping Beauty, as Alex left me a comment on my look at Matthew Bourne’s Sleeping Beauty to let me know that the ballet was not the first time the subject had been covered with a vampire twist. Truly there is very little new under the moon. I then decided to look at all the vampire related episodes – some about vampires and others where they appear in passing. All the episodes I am looking at come from the first two seasons, were found on YouTube and, if I have missed a pertinent episode, please let me know in the comments.

The house
The first season 1 episode was called While the Cat’s Away and featured brothers Dwight (Daniel DeSanto) and Stu (Noam Zylberman). They desperately want a new dirt bike and are going to ask their Dad (Don Dickinson) – who happens to be a travel agent – to buy them it. When they arrive the travel agency clearly isn’t doing too well but a customer phones asking for a no expense spared trip to Transylvania, the brothers leave the shop having heard his address.

vampire
Stu has decided to go to the house, whilst the owner is away, and steal something in order to pay for the bike. Younger Dwight is persuaded to go along with this. The derelict house is filled with secret passageways and monsters – including three identical looking vampires who play a very small part in the episode. There is some nice breaking of the fourth wall when they discover the treasure is the first edition of the Tales from the Cryptkeeper comic and it is their story.

chamber of horrors
The episode Works In Wax aired in 1993 and followed the adventures of Craig (Stuart Stone) a young boy whose favourite place is the wax museum. He is friends with the janitor William (George Buza) and the owner, Mr Rottmucker, lets him in for free. On this occasion, however, he is charged entry but he pays and goes to his favourite exhibit – the chamber of horrors with models of Count Dracula, the wolfman and Frankenstein’s Monster.

Count Dracula
He discovers that Mr Rottmucker has died and the museum has been taken over by Mr Boswick (Cedric Smith), despite the fact that Craig knows that Rottmucker left the museum to William – but they do not know where the will is. Craig ends up falling into the three displays and being transported to a place where the tableaus are real. This kind of scenario (falling into a world represented by the waxwork) had previously been done in the film Waxwork.

vampire hunters
In this Craig falls into Count Dracula’s scene first and sees a bat fly towards a crypt pursued by vampire hunters. He follows and realises that the two hunters are going to stake the Count. He hides out of view and emulates various vampire voices to make it appear there are ten vampires in the crypt, gets the hunters to throw down their stake and steals it. The hunters rumble the ruse and chase but he throws the stake and the Count gets away as he lures the hunters in another direction. Having saved the Count he returns to the museum. The Count appears again at the end of the episode when all three monsters hunt down Mr Boswick.

bats in the woods
The episode the Sleeping Beauty first aired in 1993 and followed the misadventures of two twin (not identical) princely brothers; Melvin (John Stocker) who was somewhat nerdy and 10 seconds younger than his brother Prince Charming (Stephen Ouimette) – also known as Chuck – who rode on his steed Splendour – also known as Steve. The quest was to find Sleeping Beauty (Karen Bernstein).

beauty's true form
As they progressed through the haunted forest, Charming kind of slept his way through while Melvin was plagued by wolves, snakes and demon trees. The barrier of thorns seemed to part for Charming and the two brothers were left to explore the castle. Eventually they reach beauty and Charming kisses her (having once more checked his reflection, a perpetual habit). Chuck sees that she has no reflection and she shows her true face.

vampire horse
The castle is a ruse and all the other would-be-suitors, presumed killed in the forest, are vampires in the castle too. Now I don’t want to spoil how Melvin escapes the predicament but I will say that Charming and Splendour (or Chuck and Steve, if you prefer) do not get away scot-free as they end up contracting vampirism – a fate worse than death for Charming as he can no longer check his reflection. I mention this because of the relative scarcity of vampire horses.

in the movie
Fare Tonight was a season 1 episode that first aired in 1993. Now, at the head of it the Cryptkeeper, dressed as Sherlock Holmes, suggests that it is a detective story that involves a werewolf… he is wrong. The episode starts off black and white and we see a vampire. Two girls, Mildred (Marsha Moreau) and Camille (Valentina Cardinalli), are in the cinema watching a classic vampire movie. When a punk takes the mickey out of their screams they show (fake) fangs and scare him off.

Camille and Mildred
Camille believes in vampires but Mildred is sceptical. However, with fake fangs stuck to her braces, Mildred agrees to meet Camille in a diner in a rotten part of town that night – the indication is that Camille has proof. In actual fact she has a newspaper with a story about odd goings on – which Camille puts down to a vampire. Friendly limo driver Eugene (Robert Bockstael) is going to borrow the paper but then gets a job. Camille, the next day, has built a vampire detector and the two girls go out to hunt the vampire. Their efforts, through the episode, are somewhat slapstick and Buster Keaton is mentioned.

stake \at the ready
When the detector shows a vampire nearby it appears that he is Eugene’s latest client and, worse, the client wants Eugene to drive him to Stoker street – a part of town with very little but disused warehouses. The girls jump onto their push-bikes ready to give chase and save Eugene… In this episode we get the use of garlic, the destructive power of sunlight, turning into a bat and turning into smoke or fog.

video game bats
When season 2 started the show added the Old Witch (Elizabeth Hanna) and the Vaultkeeper (David Hemblen) into the wraparound as the two characters tried to steal the show from the Cryptkeeper. The first episode was Game Over, which aired in 1994, and is a bit of a cheat as it didn’t have vampires in it as such.

vampire bats 
It followed the fortunes of Buddy (Zachary Bennett) and Vince (Miklos Perlus) who were two high school kids who would skip school to play video games – when we first see them they are playing the game Monster Blast. Now we get some bat graphics in the game and, when the game seems to become real and attack them, we see them attacked by vampire bats. Given the inclusion of werewolves and zombies I have assumed that they were vampires in bat form (we never see them in any other form) but we do also get a giant leech.

Mike and Ben
The final episode of Season 2 was a full on vampire episode called Transylvania Express in which two surfer dudes, Mike (Damon D'Oliveira) and Ben (Rob Stefaniuk), discover that their vacation is not to Australia but Austria. When they contemplate getting the Transylvania Express an old woman food seller throws stakes and garlic at them before scurrying off.

manbat
They try to buy tickets but the ticket seller (who later appears to be a conductor also) refuses them passage on the midnight train saying they must wait until morning. They decide to sneak on board, narrowly escaping a werewolf in the toilet and Frankenstein’s Monster but find an empty coffin in the cargo car. They immediately connect the coffin with a shapeshiting dude (or vampire), showing considerably more awareness than they do in the rest of the episode.

the vampires are coming
It transpires that are several vampires aboard and most of the episode is madcap chases up and down the train. Garlic, stakes and sunlight all come into it as do crap bats, manbats and general physical displacement. All in all it was a fun episode despite the two main characters being a low rent Bill and Ted.

The series was good fun and never took itself seriously. It was a lot milder than the more adult orientated live action series and involved a fair amount of slapstick. All in all the episodes together probably peak at 7 out of 10.

The series imdb page is here.

Carmilla on Stage

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Any readers in the Los Angeles area could do much worse than go to see the new stage production of Carmilla at Zombie Joe’s Underground Theatre.

Written and directed by my good friend David MacDowell Blue, he is no stranger to the Carmilla story having been the man behind the annotations of The Annotated Carmilla, which I wrote the preface for.

Tickets can be purchased here.

Honourable Mention: The ABCs of Death

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This was one of the films watched at a horror movie night I had recently with some friends. I am sure you’ll know about the concept behind this film 26 directors (1 of them having won a competition) are given a letter of the alphabet each and have to shoot a short film with a budget of $5000.

The result is a mixed bag, to tell the truth. Telling a story as a short film (especially as these were very short) is a work of art in itself. Some of these showed a master’s touch – Marcel Sarmiento’s D is for Dogfight stands out as one of the very best, well shot, a definite story (despite no dialogue) and some genuine emotion behind it. Others were not so good - Andrew Traucki’s G is for Gravity left us all cold as we viewed the film.

unearthed
Some of the films are truly disturbing – either because of the heavy (often violent) sexual perversion (Simon Rumley’s P is for Pressure being a prime example) or the sheer level of gore (despite a stinging social message I’d cite Xavier Gens’ X is for XXL as one of these). Others carry a stong dose of WTF – most noticeably Jon Schnepp’s W is for WTF! The message has to be, if you are going to watch this, gird your loins for a rollercoaster of quality and be prepared to wince occasionally. Ultimately, however, it was worth watching – indeed I watched it through again in preparation for this Honourable Mention.

the cross
Most of the shorts shy away from the supernatural but Ben Wheatley’s U is for Unearthed does feature a vampire (Laurie Rose) and the opening is the unearthing as the casket (we assume) is opened by a group of men led by Lord Scanlon (Neil Maskell, Ultraviolet (1998)). Everything we see is from the vampire’s point of view and so we see the men above him as his hands grasp out. We see the Priest (Michael Smiley) holding out a cross.

hammering it home
The vampire manages to make a break for it and bites a lone woman whilst trying to escape. Eventually – having been pierced through the arm with a burning arrow – the creature is caught. Scanlon promises that his children will know nothing of the events and then pulls out his fangs with pliers. A stake is hammered into his chest and then a man with an axe chops at the neck. The vampire is still alive as the head is pulled from the trunk and then (we assume) dies as the film turns to black.

staked and head removal
Short and sweet, it didn’t really add any great nuance to the genre or do anything too clever. It was, however, a nice change of pace amongst the other shorts and a more traditional horror was welcome in the grand scheme of the film - with the POV camera making it a little different.

The imdb page is here.


A Chinese Ghost Story (2011) – review

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Director: Wilson Yip

Release date: 2011

Contains spoilers

I find myself in debt to Leila again as she informed me of the release of this remake of the classic 1987 film A Chinese Ghost Story. The film itself I found on YouTube with English subs but, as I looked into it, I saw a lot of (almost inevitable) negativity aimed towards this remake of the original film.

This, of course, ignores the fact that the 1987 film is itself a remake of the Shaw Brother’s 1960 movie Enchanting Shadow. As for the vampire nature of the films, Enchanting Shadow most definitely had a vampiric element. It is more difficult to say with the 1987 film and we had a pole that decided the film was properly a TMtV Honourable Mention. As for this version there is definite energy vampirism and several tropes that correlate with Western media based vampirism.

Louis Koo as Yin Chek Ha
The actual start of the film gives a prologue that is very different to the other two films. It follows the Taoist swordsman character present in all three films, Yin Chek Ha (Louis Koo), when he was a younger man. It sees him hunting a demon (or ghost, but the subtitles call them demons), Siu Sin (Yifei Liu). In the sequence that is (to be fair) a little confused, we do see her leap on him and apparently go to bite the neck. It doesn’t happen, however, and the two fall in love. For reasons under-explored he decides that demons and humans cannot be together and causes her to lose her memories of him. This is caused, we later discover, by use of his “mighty weapon” (which could lead to all sorts of schoolboy jokes). When he goes to help his brethren defeat the tree demon Lou Lou (Kara Hui) he does not have that weapon and she is injured, banished but not destroyed, also two demon hunters die and another, Thunder (Siu-Wong Fan), loses an arm and kicks Yin Chek Ha out of the order.

Shaoqun Yu as Ning Choi San 
As the film starts proper it follows Ning Choi San (Shaoqun Yu) and, in homage to the 1987 film the same theme music plays. However Ning Choi San is an engineer sent to relieve the Black Mountain Village who have no water (rather than be a tax collector). He is captured by villagers (who refuse to listen to his story) and is about to have his hands cut off for stealing water when one of the villagers, Ti Nga (Jing Li), finds his imperial seal. Ti Nga is sent with him to the mountain along with workmen – who are actually all murderers shackled together, this job is their chance at redemption and pardon – as the villagers fear demons. There is a moment with him and a white fox (and candy) that may be something to do with Siu Sin but then the weather turns bad and they shelter in nearby Lan York Tze temple.

fox
The reason I mention the fox is because we see in the prologue that Sui Sin loves candy, she doesn’t immediately attack Ning Choi San (although she also later says he doesn’t have the smell that corrupt men have) and at the finale he finds her body in the form of the fox. This confuses her with the fox spirit to some degree and may explain why she later shows fangs and elliptical pupils. Back to the film and Ning Choi San is looking at a deep pool of water surrounding a tree as the convicts are seduced by women. This seduction leads to the women sucking the lifeforce out of the convicts. Sui Sin, meanwhile, is trying to seduce (half-heartedly I felt) Ning Choi San.

energy vampirism
Ti Nga is nearly got by a demon when Yin Chek Ha comes to the rescue. In this scene he despatches most of the demons bar two (snake spirits) and Sui Sin. When we see one of the demons die it sort of dusts and we see a rather bat like outline in the effect. Ning Choi San sees him kill one and takes it as a murder and thus runs with Sui Sin, trying to protect her. Of course any pursuit he offers is limited as he still loves Sui Sin and the love triangle detracts from the storyline when compared to the very simple love story portrayed in the other two versions of the tale. It also makes Yin Chek Ha much more of a primary character.

show fangs
Other vampire-like moments, then, take the form of the fact that the demons are not sucking life energy for themselves but for Lou Lou. This is to help heal her and break the banishment but she does repeatedly say that she is hungry in reference to the energy. Lou Lou later threatens to rip a heart out and drink the blood. I mentioned the fangs that Sui Sin shows, she also threatens to bite someone. As you can see there are tropes used that are familiar but the most telling factor is the sucking of energy, via a seduction, that is then used to feed the central enemy.

Kara Hui as Lou Lou
The film itself is not bad but not a patch on the two predecessor films. They took it in an unusual direction with the love triangle but it distracted more than enhanced. Ning Choi San doesn’t have the air of the innocent/fool archetype that the character had in the previous versions, partly an acting issue and partly because the film couldn’t concentrate on him as much (he just vanishes off from time to time) and the film feels a tad disjointed because of it. The final confrontation is spectacular, however.

All in all 5 out of 10. The imdb page is here.

Classic Literature: The Pale Lady

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Alexandre Dumas père is one of France’s most famous authors, known for the D’Artagnan Romances– especially the Three Musketeers– but his body of work is so much larger than that. He was a prolific author and playwright and previously we have looked at his sequel to Polidori’s The Vampyre: A Tale entitled, The Return of Lord Ruthven.

The Pale Lady is a short story, perhaps even a novella, that Dumas published in 1849 and holds the distinction of being one of the first, indeed possibly the first, vampire tales to have been set in the Carpathians.

The story is told from the point of view of Hedwig, a Polish maiden whose brothers have been killed in war with the Russians. Her father sends her and a retinue to the safety a Monastery in the Carpathians as the Russians march on their castle.

The first mention of vampires we get is within a song that is sung on their journey:

’Tis a vampire! The wild wolf 
Runs howling from the horrid thing!

The song is cut short as brigands attack the travellers. Ultimately Hedwig and four guards are left alive when the attack is interfered with. The brigands’ leader is a Moldavian called Kotsaki and the man who interferes is his half-brother Gregoriska. Gregoriska is the elder and lives in a nearby castle with their mother, who clearly favours Kotsaki, whilst the younger leads the brigands from the forest. Interestingly, Kotsaki carries Hedwig to the castle and she likens the ride to Lenore in Bürger’s poem. Often taken as a vampire poem itself, it isn’t but was quoted, famously, within Dracula.

Kotskai moves to the castle and declares his love for Hedwig (and declares that she will die if she gives her heart to another) but her heart is already given to Gregoriska and he shares her love – though neither declare it at first. News that her father has died gives her an excuse to keep Kotsaki at a distance.

Eventually Gregoriska liquidates his fortune and arranges to elope with Hedwig but Kotsaki obviously gets wind of this and – off page – brother confronts brother; Kotsaki is killed.

It is Kotsaki who haunts Hedwig as a vampire. At quarter to nine in the evening she feels a lethargy overcoming her and swoons onto her bed. She can hear footsteps approach her chamber and the door opening and then senses nothing but a throb of pain in her neck before falling into complete unconsciousness. In the morning she is exhausted (and likens this to exhaustion felt during her menstrual cycle), unnaturally pale and has something like an insect bite, a pinprick, over her carotid artery.

There an identical incident the next night and Gregoriska is confided with. They both realise it is a vampire – she recalls forty graves being opened in a cemetery, during her childhood, and seventeen bodies bearing the signs of vampirism – “that is to say, their bodies were found fresh, rosy, and looking as if still alive;” They were all staked and cremated.

Gregoriska gets her “a twig of box consecrated by the priest and still wet with holy water”. This prevents the lethargy and stops Kotsaki approaching. Gregoriska has been given the holy sword of a crusader and forces his brother to admit that his death was not an act of fratricide but the younger brother had thrown himself onto the elder’s sword – in short a suicide. They force the corpse to march back to its grave (some distance away). He gives the younger brother the chance to repent, which is refused, and uses the sword to pin him onto the earth. However the effort (spiritual not physical) kills the elder brother and both end up buried together (“God’s servant keeping watch and ward over the Devil’s”). The association of the vampire with the Devil would be repeated by Dumas 2 years later when he wrote The return of Lord Ruthven. Hedwig has to rub grave earth splashed with the vampire’s blood onto the wound to keep her safe from Kotsaki in the future. She is left with the “mark” of those who survive an attack by a vampire – an unnatural paleness.

One of the interesting things about this is the use of tropes that are familiar to post Stoker stories. The use of holy relics are explicit (and the twig of box appears to be a folk atropaic; when I googled it as research for this I found the couplet “A twig of box, a lilac spray, Will drive the goblin-horde away” in Henry Van Dyke’s Eight Echoes from the Poems of Auguste Angellier) and Hedwig is clearly being preyed upon the neck, although the description of Kotsaki doesn’t describe anything unusual about his dentition. The use of the Carpathians and the reference to Bürger does lead me to speculate as to whether Stoker was aware of the story?

The story is, of course, a tragedy. The fact that the threat lasts longer than the duration of the story (hence the use of grave dirt, which is straight from Slavic folklore) and leaves a lasting mark on the victim (the pallor of her skin) lends the tale a wonderfully dark and potentially open ending.

Zombies: the Beginning – review

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Director: Bruno Mattei (as Vincent Dawn)

Release date: 2007

Contains spoilers

You might recall the ‘Vamp or Not?’ I wrote concerning Bruno Mattei’s Island of the Living Dead. Despite being pretty much a zombie film we had a definite vampire lady, fangs on some of the zombies (making them zompires, I suspect) and body part regeneration. We also had bad acting, (almost) impossibly bad dubbing and a virtually pointless plot (almost, but everything is relative, of course).

fanged zompire
I received a comment on that post from Alex who said “I think it gets even more weirder in the sequel where they look like aliens of some sort. Zombie-vampires from outer space!” Close, in fact so very close in a very strange way. Now the vampire/zompire aspect to this is much less marked than the previous film and, had I started with this, I might have strayed away from Vamp? But they are the same creatures (primarily), originally from the same island and so this remains Vamp and gets a review.

turning dream
Now, flip to my last piece of evidence on the ‘Vamp or Not?’ where I suggested, “Spoilers-a-plenty when I say that only Sharon gets off the island but, after being picked up by the coastguard (from a raft) she is pronounced dead and then sits up with fangs and eyes red – looking pretty darn vampire” In a revisionism that would make Flash Gordon blush we see Sharon (Yvette Yzon) rescued at the beginning of this and taken to hospital, a survivor. She does have recurring dreams about being on the island and attacking the nurse after turning.

back on plot
Now I mentioned aliens… I should have mentioned Aliens – as this is the same plot as the 1986 James Cameron film except, of course, that it is on earth rather than space and has zompires in it. I say same plot… at times it is a riff on the same blooming dialogue. So, we get a hearing where file images of the crew of the Dark Star (the now named salvage ship) are projected, whilst the corporate suits refuse to believe Sharon’s story and eventually sack her. She then goes off and, in a slight stray from the Aliens plot, joins a Buddhist temple until Paul Barker (Paul Holme) asks her to come back to the plotline she left by becoming religious.

on the island
It seems that the Corporation went to the island and took “samples” to another island they own and they have lost contact with the base there. A group of marines are being sent in (who seem to be a corporate private army). Despite being offered a lucrative biologist’s contract (she was some sort of professional relic hunter in the last film) Sharon refuses; she suffers more nightmares and changes her mind. Having met the marines in the rain, prior to getting on a submarine, it is clear that the marines do not believe the tale of zombies any more than any of them can act. Soon they are on the island and exploring.

womb burster - top left
We get a story that sees experiments in breeding the zompires, because spreading the (presumably supernatural) disease through bite just ain’t enough, and the marines manage to track the corporation’s employees through tracking tattoos (!) We get moments of movement all around them, a womb-bursting foetus (with the zompire asking to be killed), the marine’s captain losing the plot when his guys (and one gal) are attacked, Sharon rescuing the troops and, later, Barker locking Sharon in a room with a “sample”. It really is a lift and drop of plot; I was only disappointed that “nuking it from offshore” wasn’t mentioned.

evil plot hatched by the zombie brain
Instead of a queen alien we get a body-less brain (where this came from is unexplained) using women, their bellies connected to big old industrial tubes, to breed cone-headed, bug-eyed, sharp-toothed zompire kids (a new species, I suppose). We get something big out in the woods - the very unrevealing close up of the snout gave nothing too much away and we don’t see it again after a fast cut “chopping in two with claws” of the communications expert. Some of the zompires have definitive fangs again but we don’t see regeneration this time nor do we see the ability to make the humans hallucinate. We also do not see the marines coming back as zompires or zombies, despite Sharon telling the survivors that those first attacked will have been turned when the tracking equipment suggests they are still alive (its the “The Sarge and Dietrich aren't dead, man...” moment from Aliens).

fanged zompire
Generally just think back to Aliens and then think how it might have been made the worst film it could dream of being… got it… you are right on track with this one. The first film threw in little homages to zombie films gone by and was pretty awful but at least tried to do its own thing even if, ultimately, it was fairly pointless. All that said it had a modicum of B movie charm. This is just a lift of a classic, which then has a cinematic mess projected over it. The acting is just as bad as the first film, the dubbing atrocious and the locations… At the beginning Sharon is taken to the Middle East Asia Central Hospital – could we get any more generic than that?

You have to see it once just to suffer as much as I did… the fact that the DVD I found on eBay had hardcoded Czech subtitles probably enhanced the experience rather than detracted. 1 out of 10 for sheer audacity.

The imdb page is here.

Dracula’s Demeter – review

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Author: Doug Lamoreux

First published: 2012

Contains spoilers

The blurb: July, 1897, the Russian schooner, Demeter, set sail from Varna with a cargo of fifty oblong boxes partially filled with earth. A month later, in the midst of a raging storm, the derelict Demeter ran aground in Whitby, England, her crew missing save for her captain, who was tied to the wheel with a crucifix in his lifeless hands. The only living thing aboard was a huge dog that escaped into the night.

Bram Stoker, in his classic 'Dracula', with a few cryptic entries in an unnamed captain's journal, offered scant hints regarding the terrifying voyage that brought the vampire king from his homeland to a blood-rich London. Now, the whole mind-rending tale is told.

The story of Trevor Harrington, a British scholar and fugitive. Of Swales, the old Scot cook, who deceives their commander, but knows a good deal "aboon grims and boh-ghosts". Of Ekaterina Gabor, a beautiful Romanian who follows her lover by stowing away. Of Captain Nikilov, fighting for his ship and crew while something evil, more virulent than the black plague, decimates their number. Of Demeter herself, named for the Greek goddess of renewal, lost and tossed on an unforgiving sea. And of Count Dracula, at rest in Demeter's dark hold until the unintended actions of her crew resurrect the vampire and his unquenchable bloodlust.

Join Doug Lamoreux, 2010 Rondo Award nominee, author of The Devil's Bed, for a rousing sea adventure... for romance... and for terror. Come aboard Dracula's Demeter!

The review: I don’t find it surprising that people are intrigued by the last voyage of the Demeter, the ill-fated ship that brings Count Dracula to Whitby in Stoker’s seminal Dracula. The bare bones of the story are given to us by Stoker but the flesh is not there. Hence the film that has been on the horizon but never quite been produced, hence IDW’s graphic Death Ship.

When I reviewed the graphic I stated that “a film - if ever forthcoming - will really have to explore character (and make them rounded) to stand scrutiny, methinks.” Enter Doug Lamoreux…

Lamoreux is a self-confessed romantic (according to facebook posts that I’ve seen) and it shows within the novel. Of course, when I say romantic, I mean of the romantic movement and thus he builds a swirling epic out of what is essentially Ten Little Indians but never loses sight of the tension that the journey demands. It is the characters, however, that provide the meat of this story. Interesting and well-rounded, the author built a collection of characters that we could sympathise with – even though we knew what their fate was always going to be. His Count Dracula was perhaps less rounded than the rest of his characters but he was a true villain, there wasn’t an ounce of redemption within him and that was good to see.

After a sojourn on land, at the head of the book, the novel maintains its berth on ship with just the occasional moment in England. These are with Renfield, Lamoreux builds upon the Count's psychic link with the incarcerated madman, and also with Lucy, establishing that she, like Renfield, was sensitive to the Count’s psychic call and that his predation on her, in the original novel, was not as coincidentally random as it seemed – it was an interesting direction.

If I have to call foul it is ship’s cook (and default medic) Swales knowing about blood types. It’s idiosyncratic as they weren’t actually discovered until 1901 and, of course, the learned Van Helsing (in the original novel) was utterly ignorant of them. A minor moment where I emerged from the author’s literary spell but, beyond that, I found myself thoroughly immersed. Blood types aside I was especially delighted with the inclusion of Swales Jr (though he was hardly a spring chicken himself) a great original character and yet a link through to the original novel. All in all, good fun, an epic journey with a heart of darkness. 7.5 out of 10.

Futurama: Fry Am the Egg Man – review

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Directors: Dwayne Carey-Hill & Peter Avanzino

First aired: 2011

Contains spoilers

Futurama was, for me, one of the best, freshest adult orientated animations to come out of the States for some time. Its knowing scripts, poking well meaning fun out of the genre it aped – as well as many other targets – always seemed to hit the spot for me.

This episode was out of the sixth season and features – at long last – an alien vampire (I should also give a mention to the much earlier were-car episode, which is still one of my favourites). Vampires had appeared, in cameo and on an in-episode film, during the episode I Dated a Robot but, being Futurama, when a vampire was the feature part of the episode it was not your average vampire, oh no.

incubation, Fry style
It begins with Leila (Katey Sagal), Fry (Billy West, Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island) and Bender (John DiMaggio Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust& Batman: the Brave and the Bold: Shadow of the Bat) running from a delivery, chased by a horde of axe flinging robots. Having escaped they go to a fast food fly-through but Leila decides she is unhappy with fast food and takes them to an organic market and buys eggs. The next day Fry realises that the eggs are fertile and refuses to eat one (until it hatches) and aims to incubate it by sitting on it.

Bonus Vampiris
After a week of sitting duties he drops the egg, but the embryo has developed into a nasty looking, blue, acid-spitting creature that melts bender’s feet. Fry calls it Mr Peppy (Maurice LaMarche, Gravedale High, Captain Planet and the Planeteers: the Energy Vampire& The real Ghostbusters: No One Comes to Lupusville) but as it grows there is a further incident with it “removing” Bender’s arm. Professor Farnsworth (also Billy West) has been doing some research however and has discovered that the creature is, in Latin, Bonus Vampiris or (for the non-Catholics) a Bone Vampire. Asexual, self-reproducing creatures they suck the bones from creatures. They are extinct on their own planet, Doohan 6 (named after James Doohan, Scotty in Star Trek), and so they have the idea to reintroduce Mr Peppy to the wild.

bones sucked
Having done so, Bender detects alcohol and they find a local village and inn (with a rather distinctively, stereotypical Scottish vibe perfectly fitting for a planet named Doohan 6). When the locals discover that they have reintroduced the bone vampire there is shock; one of their number, Major Angus McZongo Esq (also Maurice LaMarche), had hunted the beasts to extinction as they had been a blight on their livestock. Fry argues that Mr Peppy is vegetarian but there is an attack on the livestock during the night…

Mr Peppy
Which is as far as I will go though I will say there is a knowing Scooby-Doo element to the episode. All in all, it was great fun, with sharp writing and a soft-heart that doesn’t stray to saccharine. The voice acting was as good as you’d expect (there is a nice sub-story with bender annoying everyone with El Jerko cigars). All told a worthwhile addition to the alien vampire genre.

7 out of 10.

The episode's imdb page is here.

Chastity Bites – review

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Director: John V. Knowles

Release date: 2013

Contains spoilers

This is an Erzsébet Báthory film with an almost Cherry Falls twist. It contains a lovely new (I’m pretty damn certain) twist of lore that raises what was essentially a mildly amusing average offering that little bit, as it brings a new toy to the table.

I am also going to have to spoil the ending – in that Erzsébet loses – so as to capture other lore they put into the film. But I won’t spoil how they get there (I hope).

scream like a girl...
It all begins in a car, and a pair of teens are making out. As it becomes a little hot and heavy the girl, Nicole (Greer Grammer), stops the boy, George (Kevyn Ruiz). She tells him that sex is a sacred act to be reserved for marriage and that she is keeping them from the gates of Hell. She doesn’t see the knife that comes from behind and slits her throat. He screams like a girl.

Leah and katherine
Welcome to San Griento where we meet feminist school journalist Leah (Allison Scagliotti) and her best friend Katherine (Francia Raisa). Leah’s journalistic nose has made her somewhat of a pariah both in school and in the town. Both Leah and Katherine are treated with disdain by the “mean girl” clique known as the Hiltons. Leah gets wind that the 4 Hiltons intend to lose their virginities together, as a team.

Louise Griffiths as Liz
At a cocktail party the town elite meet (including the mothers of three of the Hiltons). Leader of the older versions of the Hiltons is Jillian (Laura Niemi) who warns of the dangers from socialists and the liberal homosexual agenda. She has decided to look at an abstinence agenda and has found a leader, from Europe, called Liz Batho (Louise Griffiths, The Revenant). The older Hiltons ask Liz how she stays so young and she mentions a beauty regime and that she will let them in on her secret.

Vag
At school Liz is introduced to the senior girls and a new society, the Virginity Action Group, is announced. Now obviously the acronym is VAG but the film cleverly left that joke silent and thus it worked that bit better. Liz is looking for youth leaders and the Hiltons volunteer. This, of course, knackers up Leah’s en masse deflowering story about them (and she is immediately distrustful of Liz). Later we find that the girls are doing this as they have been led to believe that it will lead to an MTV reality TV show.

Stepford Vampires
So, moving forward Katherine become intrigued and attracted to Liz. Leah becomes more distrustful, whilst being ignorant of the advances of a student called Paul (Eduardo Rioseco), and this causes a rift between the two girls. Leah discovers that Liz is Erzsébet (and we find out that Leah is the descendant of the man who stopped her in her original killing spree) but no one believes her. The mums are introduced to the beauty treatment and become, essentially, a group of Stepford Vampire Brides – willing to hand their daughters over to Liz for youth and beauty.

burning blood
I said there was some interesting new lore. Erzsébet’s beauty is tied in to witchcraft and human sacrifice as well as blood. Every year she has to sacrifice five virgins to renew her demonic pact and then (as she kills virgins through the film) there is the on-going beauty blood treatments. The new lore is that if blood from a woman who is not a virgin touches her skin it burns – which I thought was a lovely new touch.

rapid decay
To kill her there is a combination of spear through her (perhaps staking through the heart) and foiling her sacrifice. This leads to her rapid decay. With the demonic pact gone the followers rapidly age completely past their original age pre-beauty treatments. However Katherine, who has her acne cleared by Liz with her “balm” does not age. Liz mentions that she was, when originally caught, walled up and had to die to escape. That she was buried for fourteen days before a follower could dig her up and she could be made to live again. Thus I think it safe to suggest that she is undead. There isn’t much more in the way of lore though there is a nice reference by having her unwilling servant called Ilona (Diana Chiritescu), who in dress and looks was reminiscent of Báthory’s maid Ilona in the film Daughters of Darkness.

blood facial
The film itself was ok, the humour wasn’t bad but wasn’t laugh out loud funny and the film itself was quirky rather than horror. It would probably just be classed as an average film that played around with the Báthory myth if it wasn’t for the burning nature of non-virgin blood, which by adding a new aspect to the genre pushes the film to just above average in my view. 5.5 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

Stage Blood: Vampires of the 19th Century Stage – review

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Author: Roxana Stuart

First published: 1994

Contains spoilers

The blurb: Roxana Stuart’s study approaches the subject primarily from the viewpoint of literary criticism but also includes production history, providing the reader with a useful look at theatre practices, as well as social and psychological insights into popular taste and imagination as reflected in the changing persona with which each period and culture endows the vampire, from the relative innocence of the Romantics to the evolving patterns of sadism, misogyny and xenophobia of the end of the century.

The review: There are precious few serious studies of the 19th century plays that featured vampires and so Roxana Stuart’s book is most welcome. It is split into two parts, the largest section being entitled Ruthven and examines the plays of the 19th century that were, primarily, based around Polidori’s the Vampyre: A Tale. This is the strongest section of the book. The second, much shorter, part is entitled Dracula and is based out of the time period as there was only one stage production of Stoker’s novel in the 19th Century – the dramatic reading at the Lyceum designed to establish copyright. This section therefore slews into the 20th century and film.

There are some erroneous aspects to the book. For instance mention is made of a medieval manuscript, Vampire of the Fens, which never existed. There is an over-egging of the role Prince Vlad III played in Stoker’s mind in respect of the creation of his character Count Dracula, however when the book was written that was the common, perceived wisdom and the sterling work of Elizabeth Miller had not been done around this subject. There are definitely more errors around the second section (Georges Méliès’ la manoir du Diable was not a vampire film – as much as I want it to have been – and there was not a Hammer Dracula movie called Twins of Dracula!) but this is not Stuart’s area of expertise.

Nor should these put a student of the vampire off buying this book. The first section is a mine of information about 19th century vampire theatre, it is a lively read for a reference work, it is referenced and has an extensive index. The appendices that list dramatisations, plot, biographies and cast lists are wonderfully useful also.

Definitely needed on a vampire genre fan’s shelf. 7.5 out of 10.


Honourable Mention: Billy and Mandy’s Big Boogey Adventure

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The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy was a Cartoon Network series about a somewhat slow boy called Billy (Richard Steven Horvitz), and the ill-tempered, cynical girl called Mandy (Grey DeLisle) who won a limbo competition and forced the Grim Reaper (Greg Eagles) to be their best friend for all time.

Billy and Mandy’s Big Boogey Adventure was the first feature length cartoon of their adventures and the Boogey of the title is the Boogey Man (Fred Willard). However we begin two weeks in the future with a broken world as robot versions of Billy and Mandy (the Billybot and Mandroid) are sent back to destroy Billy and Mandy. This is observed by Billy and friend Irwin (Vanessa Marshall) though they miss jumping into the time vortex after them.

Dracula on jury service
In our time Grim misses getting a soul, having been forced to take Billy and Mandy to work with him and is summoned to face prosecution for dereliction of duty. His prosecutor is his old nemesis the Boogey Man. He loses the case and is stripped of his powers and his scythe. Thus begins an adventure as they are exiled but aim to find the artefact Horror’s Hand (Greg Ellis) before Boogey can get it as it holds the key to being the scariest creature in the universe.

Dracula as the Colonel?
So why the mention? Well a recurring appearance (for split seconds) of Dracula. We see a picture of him being one of many who stole Grim’s scythe. He is part of the jury at Grim’s trial (and declares that Dracula hates jury service). He even turns up later on, now in a white suit and looking like a fanged version of the KFC Colonel, to laugh at Boogey.

The imdb page is here.

Rigor Mortis – review

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Director: Juno Mak

Release date: 2013

Contains spoilers

The Chinese vampire, the kyonsi (or spelling variants thereof), has perhaps had a lamentable un-life in films. For every classic film such as Mr Vampire there are rather more that are lower quality. The figure itself can attract ridicule, the hopping motion the vampire makes can attract derision and the Chinese lore can be misunderstood by Western audiences – but it should, ultimately, be a creature of horror not comedy. It is perhaps little wonder that some Chinese filmmakers have moved to a more Western style vampire.

the film has a whole lot of style
The Japanese, however, seem to have revived the kyonsi recently. The kitschy comedy Hao! Hao! Kyonshi Girl featured the creatures but was as much to do with the Japanese idol scene as actual vampires. The producers of Rigor Mortis are Takashi Shimizu, who was behind the Ju-on series, and director Juno Mak, bringing a sense of both Japan and China to the table. Mentioning Mr Vampire was deliberate, however, as this is in tribute to that film (and the whole kyonsi genre) and a production still of Mr Vampire’s cast is visible during this film.

Yau in the aftermath
The film opens in the aftermath of a battle. We see the body of Aunty Mui (Hee Ching Paw), against a wall sits Yau (Anthony Chan, Mr vampire and Mr Vampire 4) who wearily smokes a cigarette, looking battered, and on the floor, covered in clay, Siu-hou Chin (himself, Mr Vampire, Vampire Vs Vampire, Chinese Vampire Story, The Seventh Curse& Vampire Warriors) looks to be dead until he rolls over.

Chin arrives
The film follows the events from Chin moving into a monolithic, decaying tenement block, up to the battle. Chin is an actor who had some success in the past but is all out of luck. He enters the shambling, almost post-modern Gormenghast, apartment complex and heads to his new home. In the lift he sees an albino kid, Pak, who has been egged (presumably by other children – we never find out). Chin reaches his apartment, 2442, and it is chained closed. The only security guard the building has, Uncle Yin (Hoi-Pang Lo), comes along and unlocks the outer security door. He knocks before entry and makes great play about lighting incense and asking any spirits to play nice.

one last listen
After unpacking his case, mainly memorabilia including a couple of film costumes, the film cuts to Chin who has put dust covers through the barren apartment, is stood on a stool, has a noose around his neck and a child's drawing of a watch on his wrist. He listens to a message from his son asking when he will come home and we see imagery that indicates his family are dead (or, at the very least, he is dead to them). He hangs himself. As his body struggles against the noose a dust sheet rises in a human shape. Blood seeps through it and then the spirit that animates it transfers into Chin.

the mirror reveals the possession
Possessed, he struggles supernaturally against the noose. Yau breaks into his home, cuts him loose and then battles against him until he can cast the spirit out of Chin. By the time the fight is over (and the phone Chin had is broken in the fight) a crowd has gathered outside the door. Aunty Mui comes in but Yau holds her back until Chin spews black gunk. In the crowd, watching all this, is a man named Gau who – we discover later – is a black magician.

Anthony Chan as Yau
Later Chin goes to the small kitchen in the building where Yau prepares free meals for the residents (who are few in number). Yau makes him some gluttonous rice and Mui offers to fix his costumes (she sews for many of the residents). She goes back to her husband, Tung (Richard Ng, Mr Vampire 3), whilst Yau speaks to Chin. Yau is descended from a line of vampire hunters but cooks gluttonous rice as all the vampires have disappeared. Chin does not believe in the supernatural (presumably he has no memory of the possession part of his suicide attempt).

Tung's death
Tung goes to take trash out and, distracted by a child – which we can see is unnatural – falls, smashing himself up as he does. Later he returns to Mui and she washes his feet – he tells her he will return in a few days and she awakens. He is dead and she goes to Gau to help prepare his body for his spirit’s return. The film then follows the mystical preparation of his corpse and its change into the vampire of the film – which Yau and Chin have to battle.

the twins
Like many Chinese Vampire films this features ghosts and, in this case, Chin’s apartment is haunted by twin girls who were subject to rape, the murder of one and the suicide of the other. The killer was Pak’s father, who was killed by one of the Twins. Pak's mother, Feng (Kara Hui, A Chinese Ghost Story (2011)), and he both live, homeless, within the building living off food left out by residents who worship ancestors. Feng is drawn to the apartment but can see the Twins and they terrify her. These ghosts are much more serious and vengeful than in a standard Chinese vampire movie and owe a lot to Japanese stylisation.

Tung hops
As for Tung, when he activates – as it were – he does hop but he also glides on his toes and the vampire has a heavy physical presence that offers a darkness that belies any derision. At a point when he is possessed by the twins, he crawls across the ceiling and walls. We see the holding of breath to avoid him. We also get, within the lore, lung cancer being held off by smoking the ashes of unborn children. There is a satisfying turn around at the end that I won’t spoil.

Mui with Tung
The actual making of the vampire involves burying him in soil, in a dark place where he used to live (the bathtub) and then transferring him into a coffin that is kept off the ground. He has to wear a coin mask always (the removal of this allows the transformation to fully occur), crows blood is administered, his hair and nails continue to grow and for an hour each night – before fully becoming kyonsi – his one eye (Mui sewed one shut due to damage) opens. Corpse oil can attract an activated vampire.

ghost procession
The acting is superb throughout and the visual style is simply stunning. The colour scheme is mostly muted, and that adds to the atmosphere, with moments of vivid colour (mainly red) but the actual photography is wonderful and, as a directorial début, you couldn’t really wish for better. The use of soundtrack is striking and uses pieces from Mr Vampire. There are moments that are simply not explained, such as a ghost procession that Chin looks away from and, despite his claim to not believe, is never subsequently discussed. Moments like this add to the atmosphere. One thing that is stripped from this, which is apparent in most of the kyonsi films including Mr Vampire, is the humour. The film doesn’t miss it however.

Tung activated
Mr Vampire is a classic, it is true. It is outstanding that a tribute to it could be even better. I’m putting this down to the visual feast that it is and the pacing that clicks along like a metronome, never once faltering. 9 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

Elizabeth Bathory – review

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Director: Elizabeth Nixon

Release date: 2014

Contains spoilers

It’s always nice to see independent filmmakers pull a project together, and I am always intrigued to see how such filmmakers will push past the constraints that low budget will place upon them.

In the case of the film Elizabeth Bathory it is achieved by reducing the film to (virtually) one set. There is some establishing photography of a castle and the moon. There are some limited outdoor flash back shots and some white background blood bathing and victims motifs. But mostly we are in one single cell in the castle.

The danger of this approach is that you need actors who can carry it off…

main cast
The film opens up with intertitles that suggest that Elizabeth Bathory (I’ll stick with the Anglicisation of her name for the duration of the review) suffered from a hereditary disease that caused light sensitivity, brittle teeth, pale skin and anti-social behaviour and that the symptoms could only be alleviated with the consumption of blood. At the end of the film we are informed, by intertitle again, that this disease is called hypohemepathia. The end intertitles also suggest some historic aspects to Bathory’s story.

Kathleen Denecke asAnika
I contacted producer Andrew Nixon as the disease didn’t – according to google – exist. He admitted it was invented for the film (and I knew that the historical facts were either stretched or out with accepted historic knowledge of the case). Why do I mention it? Certainly not to attack it – as the invention worked well with the story. No, I mention it so that someone, at some point in the future, doesn’t mention it unsourced but verbatim as fact. It is fiction.

Katherine dragged to cell
That having been said we see a woman, Katherine (Tilke Hill), as she is dragged to a cell. She is screaming and then, in the cell, prays hysterically. She doesn’t notice, at first, that the cell is occupied by another woman, Anika (Kathleen Denecke). We see that Anika has a knife. At first Katherine tries to speak to the younger woman but she does not respond. It is only later, as a thin chink of sunlight enters the cell and causes Katherine to declare it is from God to comfort them that Anika speaks and that is to tell the newcomer to stop praying as it hurts her ears.

Adah Hagen as Zsofia
The film progresses as the two women, slowly, begin to trust and open up to each other. It seems that Katherine is missing some memory. She remembers times with her older sister Zsofia (Adah Hagen) – we see these scenes as moments, outdoors. Later, when it seems that they have been fed twice, Katherine remembers some details and realises they are in the dungeon belonging to Countess Bathory – she always feeds them twice when she is to select a victim, to help keep the strength up.

Both women have secrets they hide from each other, and themselves and it is the revealing of these secrets that is the main thread of the film.

Tilke Hill as Katherine
I say film but this could easily translate to being a play, due to the simplicity of the scene. However what is important here is the performances of the main actresses. Kathleen Denecke gives an excellent, praiseworthy performance but Tilke Hill’s performance can be called nothing less than astonishing, a powerhouse of a performance. Both women keep us hooked into this tiny world, both draw us in as we wait to see how their stories will reveal and how their psyches will withstand their imprisonment. Kudos, also, to the Nixons, whose tightly written dialogue facilitates these performances.

despair 
Criticisms… I did guess one main secret early on, but there were moments of doubt as the film unravelled, which made me suspicious of my own guess. On a couple of occasions I felt the soundtrack perhaps was a little overpowering, which was probably just me but it was only a couple of times and mostly it accompanied the film well.

The film is on independent release and can be found to buy on DVD or streamed on demand via the film’s homepage. It is recommended for those who like their dramas to be character driven and thoughtful. 7 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

So Dark – kickstarter

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You might remember a pair of shorts I reviewed, So Pretty and So Dark.

If not, then please do check out the reviews as I was rather impressed with them.

Anyway, director Al Lougher is looking to make a third film in the series and he has a crowd-sourcing appeal running to that effect via Indiegogo. This is what they had to say: “We want to make a film that will help put us, and our lead vampire Sean, on the map. Specifically, we feel that once we've made our 3rd film in this series we'll be able to grab the attention of either Hollywood, or TV networks so we can continue on with the series and even start shooting our feature film version of So Dark later in the year.” Ambitious stuff.

If you feel you can help then the fundraising goes on for 9 more days and the crowd-sourcing page can be found here.

Marthas Garten – review

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Director: Peter Liechti

Release date: 1997

Contains spoilers

A Swiss film noir shot in black and white with a central vampire aspect is not exactly the most common cinematic fare but it is exactly what Peter Liechti gave us. A film utterly different than the blurb offered on the Amazon disc page that is clearly for a different movie!

The film starts with people watching clowns on TV in a shop window and a girl with a balloon (and, as I watched, this invoked the film M). Karl Winter (Stefan Kurt) is in a coffee shop and it is his voice that leads us through the film. He finds the coffee shop pleasant, so pleasant he doesn’t wish to ever leave. He does leave though making his way home through the quiet and dull town.

Stefan Kurt as Karl
His voice-over suggests that life would have been different if he was either five minutes earlier or later. As it was he turns a corner to see a woman, Martha (Susanne Lüning) kneeling over the prostrate body of a man as she sees him she runs off. As he goes to the man she returns and tells Karl that he is dead, falls into Karl’s arms and then is sick on his shoulder. Yet, despite this, he finds himself attracted to her. She passes him a tissue but he sends her to get help.

the bus
As he waits with the body he notices someone in a building nearby closing a window (Karl is holding the man's head at this point and drops it heavily to the ground as the window closes). He sees a bus pass by, the passengers all seem to be looking at him. He gets cold feet as it is not his type of adventure. He wonders why she was fumbling with the dead man’s collar and eventually he walks away wondering if he was seen with the body.

snow canoeing 
He goes for a day out with his friend Uwe (László I. Kish) but doesn’t tell his friend what happened despite the fact that Martha is on his mind. He and Uwe go out to have adventures, this time it is dragging a canoe up a mountainside as the wind turns the snowfall into the best part of a blizzard to toboggan down the slope. At other times they play with home-made Chinese lanterns or fire rocks into the air with a catapult to see how close they can get the falling stone to them without hitting them.

Karl-Ulrich Meves as Tepesh
When Karl returns home he is accosted by a man, later we discover he is called Mr Tepesh (Karl-Ulrich Meves). He has been waiting for Karl and has brought flowers from Martha who wants to explain things to him. She arrives but no explanation is given. They kiss and end up in bed but in the morning she is gone. He eventually tells Uwe and Uwe’s girlfriend Claire (Nina Hoger) about Martha. She is really playing on his mind and he thinks he sees her in the coffee shop but she isn’t there.

they kiss
Getting to his flat he finds her inside and she begs that he not send her away. In the morning he dreams that as he strokes her skin it is fur he feels. When he awakens Tepesh and his neighbour are both in his flat, Tepesh is moving into a flat at the top of the building. As his relationship with Martha develops he is frustrated by the fact that she tells him nothing about her life, she vanishes for periods of time and seems to think she is being followed.

checking her reflection
He gets more and more paranoid. She has shown him a newspaper report about hikers torn apart by dogs, she carries stories in her purse about vampires and Tepesh seems to have some hold over her. At one point he even checks her reflection, whilst she sleeps, in a mirror. Could she be a vampire? Or Tepesh? Indeed is he surrounded by them as he begins to think?

Susanne Lüning as Martha
The film is a mystery, of course, and I think that’s where it finds its strength and its weakness. As a twisted noir it works really well but once it builds to its strange conclusion you know where it has taken you and it makes repeated viewings weak. However, on first watch, I was enthralled as Karl guided us down the rabbit hole. The leads are excellent, Stefan Kurt balances paranoia and plausibility with aplomb and Susanne Lüning is suitably the woman of mystery with perhaps a look reminiscent of Catherine Deneuve. Liechti manages to steer a course through the strangeness whilst ensuring that the film keeps a foothold in the mundane. 6 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

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